Well.....
I guess it begins when I was 15. Going through high school I found the world an extremely interesting place. I was forever pushing boundaries and reaching new levels. Life was simple and I was the spoilt teen who got what ever she wanted off of her parents. I didn't think anything would destroy me.
Then divorce came.
My parents where never the type to show affection for each other...and it wasn't until recently that I discovered how incredible unhappy they were. This rocked my world. I think for anyone the idea of "happy ever after" begins with the loving family your parents create for you. I mean they instill the beliefs and views that you hold closest to your heart of hearts. I don't blame either one of them for what happened, but I became withdrawn and negative, without a soul noticing.
Over the next 5 years I entered into a progressive downward spiral of crappy boyfriends, partying, drinking and developing an over the top personality to hide my pain. I stopped believing in forever, love, of any of it and only thought of the now. While living in the now is fun and a vital part of life it doesn't allow for much security or for many people to enter and play vital roles in your life.
I felt lost alone and completely abandoned until one day I logged onto trust old facebook and had a MASSIVE deep and meaningful with a man that I barely knew. Over the next 6 months he would open my eyes to the mess of myself and my life. He truely cared and wanted to understand me. I was diagnosed with insomnia, anxiety disorder and depression. I came to rely on him as my only companion and it took a lot on our relationship.
One year on and I am happy to say I have my life on track. I have recognised the things I can and can not change and I have also learnt to accept the situations that test our beliefs. I am starting this blog in the hope that my experiences may help someone else gain some insight into their own crazy and hectic lives.
.....OH and did I mention my long distance friend is now my fiance.
